Energy

Wednesday seemed to be a day all about energy. It started with a conversation with my manager about the 'energies' that are brought to the workplace, and how just one person can affect the rest.
Then there was a Reiki class which was ALL about energy, the transfer of energy, the healing powers of energy, etc.
And then on the way home my iPod randomly played a song (and I wish I could remember which song it was because that is the important bit), that once again made me think of energy and how it passes between people.
I realized something, and it seemed quite profound at the time, that every relationship we enter into is just a form of energy transfer. There are those relationships that energize us, seemingly creating energy from the space between us. There are those that wear us out, those that build us up, and even those that seem to keep us level and stable. So, then my mind wandered to the relationships in my life and what kind of energy to they bring to the table. I have some great friends, co-workers, on-line buddies and family members that provide me with interesting, stimulating relationships and bring plenty of positive energy into my life. (I love you guys, you know who you are) I have those relationships that seem to keep me level and grounded, which are great, unless you really need some of that super positive energy to pull you up from a bad day. And then I thought about the relationships that are sucking the life out of me. Thankfully, I only came up with one (at least one obvious one). And it is a singularly one sided relationship that I'm still feeding energy into even though none is being returned. Maybe that is why I'm so tired all the time! Maybe it isn't a chemical imbalance, a mental imbalance, a vitamin deficiency, boredom, stress, or any of those other go to answers. Perhaps it is purely an energy imbalance where I continue to give and receive nothing in return. Time to cut off the power going in that direction and take it back for myself. This is going to be more difficult than it sounds. You would think after 11 months I could just write the relationship off, pull my energy back in and move on, but thus far it hasn't happened. Perhaps I've been unwilling to put the extra energy into letting go, maybe I haven't felt like I had the energy reserve available to do that. I don't know. Its crazy.
The lovely woman I mentioned in my last post says she feels no chemistry with me. I'm okay with that, I'm happy to be friends. Perhaps that is all that I'm ready for at the moment anyway, but maybe she feels no chemistry with me because I don't have the energy available to put into that spark, its still all travelling down a dead-end connection and short circuiting everything else. Stuff to think about over the coming weeks.
Time to find my energy source, regain my power, and live my life. Time to stop allowing the absence of another to continue to pull my life out of me. Its over, and although I've said a few dozen times, its time to move on.

Libra Horoscope for week of November 3, 2011

I suspect that you will have a minor form of good luck going for you this week. It probably won't be enough to score you a winning lottery ticket or earn you a chance to get the answer to your most fervent prayers. But it might bring you into close proximity with a financial opportunity, a pretty good helper, or a resource that could subtly boost your stability over the long haul. For best results, don't invoke your mild blessings to assist in trivial matters like finding parking places or avoiding long lines at check-out lines. Use them for important stuff.

Somewhere there's a treasure that has no value to anyone but you, and a secret that's meaningless to everyone except you, and a frontier that harbors a revelation only you would know how to exploit. Why not go in search of those things?

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